Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Baby



If I say that I’m in pain, I’m scared that I’ll really be in pain. If I say that I’m sad, I’m scared that I will shed my tears. Why don’t I just laugh, just laugh, just laugh. But people ask me why I’m crying. Everyday I cry, I smile, cry then smile again. What’s wrong with me, why do I do this repeatedly? So far in my life, I never felt pain this excruciating. Absentmindedly, I write your name over and over on a piece of paper. In a day, the paper becomes black and I finally let the pen go. I long for you, I hold on to my cellphone and let it go. My eyes are filling up with tears again, this separation between us. I’m without a heart, I don’t have a heart. So I wouldn’t be feeling pain. Everyday I talk to myself, and put myself under a spell. But even so, I keep shedding my tears. After you left, I think I became a fool. I can’t do, I can’t do anything, so I die. I shove myself into a corner and live. Without you there’s nothing left to do. A day is too long, way too long. But what was I busy with, to make you feel so lonely, when you wanted to go shopping, going out with my friends was so easy, but why couldn’t I do the same to you? I always regretted being so slow, I don’t know if I’m really stupid, but I still can’t let go of our bond. I’m without a heart, I don’t have a heart. Again today, I can see through your lies. My heart is in so much pain, I’m begging for your help. How can I smile in times like this? 'let’s smile' like couples in dramas 'let’s smile' like the title of your blog 'let’s smile' happy like in my pastI’m without a heart, I can’t be in pain. I’m without a heart, I can’t be in pain. Let’s just laugh, just laugh, just laugh. Please, please let’s stop crying now.


p.s pegi la dengar cakap orang lain tu.. pegi !