Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I'm bruised and scarred


He'll never know I want to run, I want to hide from all the pain he caused inside. I want to scream, I want to cry. Why can't I tell him goodbye? I want to move on, I just can't let go. I love him more than he will ever know. I want to start over, I want to feel free! but this pain will never leave me be. He hurt me bad, the pain is deep. How can i forget him? Leave the him behind? Erase the memories from my mind? He will never care, how i feel. Pain! Pain! go away ! go away! Please do not come back another day.

Tears falling down my face oh how I wish for his warm embrace. Wonder if he cares about me. wonder if this is suppose to be. How can he stand there and break my heart? How did we allow us to grow so far apart? My dreams of us being happy is not going to come true all i am feeling is down and blue. Pain pls go away bring me back to another day where he loved me and we thought we were meant to be. I will not stop loving you that much, is true but i will be stronger in time. You will always be in my heart even when we are apart.

One day i will have that warm embrace and tears will stop flowing down my face. pain pain go away leave me alone and do not stay. i cry i’m sitting on the porch wind blowing through my hair everyone around me laughs at me but i just can’t seem to care life goes on around me. i don’t participate i go through all the motions but what i really do is wait i dream about the day that you’ll come home to me nothing else is important. why can’t people see? i don’t want to go out, i don’t want to have fun, i don’t want to do a thing until all is said done they took you in the summer now fall is almost finished winter will be here very soon and then the year will have diminished you have no idea. how much i cry i never let you know! it’s so hard out here without you but i’m not allowed to let it show, i must pretend all is fine. everyone thinks all’s okay but what i never ever tell them is that i cry for you every day. i miss him i miss his arms around me,i miss when there was a we, he used to hold me and say i love you. he even has a new girl, but she makes me want to hurl. anymore, i hide inside, lock the door, he's pushed me to the side,i turn to the corner and cry, each day i almost die.

he don't care,he's not there,he's left me here, to dry my own tear.he told me, once, he would always be by my side, but now inside of me, i hide,he's run from me, but this event had a big possibility. guys run away, they come and go, but never stay, they get your hopes up, but only to tear you down, don't turn your back to them, don't turn around. many say,i'll never go away, but most never keep this,even though they promise.they love us for a while, then come back with a new style,they girls they date, we hate. i wish he'd wrap his arms around me again,put me back in heaven, but all he's doing is breaking my heart,and tearing me apart.i keep on crying, all the time, i'm dying,when will all this pain stop, when will i raise to the top? although we say we love flowers, yet we pick them like we picked each other, suddenly we both let go and now theres nothing left to discover. i'm letting go,just so you know, i think i'm okay now,i think i'm over you,'re gone,so i'm moving on, don't hold me back,i'm finally ready to pack.i'm saying good-bye, please don't ask why,i loved you, but now i'm over you, i still love you, i promise i do.

You cheated. why can't you love me the way you should? i know you could... instead my heartache is what your choosing. it's me that you are loosing. i hate what you've done to me, i was all that you ever wanted me to be, i'm not blind, i can see. i see your game, i'm not insane, you are hurting me. after everything i have done for you, everything i gave you, you turn around and cheat? all the times and memories we have spent together you even said we'd be forever. you made me sick, she is what you want to pick. you made me cry while you told a lie, you made me want to die. i knew i was right, you were out of my sight, you really ruined my life. how could you ask me to forgive you? how many times can i? you have lost my trust over what i call lust. you chose to hurt me it was a must. i hope your happy for what you did to me, right now your blind but soon you will see. how it used to be i remember how it used to be when nothing else matter. i miss you, i wish you could see although you are here, i miss you and me. i remember when you said how happy i made you and you really meant it. now, it's just a phrase you say without thinking. i miss those days when you'd call just to say "i miss you" or "i love you". the days it was so hard just to say good-bye for a while. i remember how wonderful it felt the first time you held me in your arms-and how after all those years you still made my heart melt. i miss the old you and the old me the old us that could just sit and talk for hours and never run out of things to say. i remember when time simply stood still- when in each other's arms is the only place we wanted to be forever. i miss us as i remember how it used to be. when nothing else matter but you and me. my good-bye letter for all the tears you made me cry. for all the lies you ever told, i hope you tell no more. for all the stress you put me through, i hope one day you feel it too. for all the days i just wanted to give up but hoped you would change, i hope the days you spend without me make you feel the same way. for all the heartache you have ever caused me, i hope your never heart hurts, i still deeply love you!

something you should know, i dont wanna smile if your smiling at me, i dont wanna live this life of mine if your not gonna live it with me. i dont wanna cry if your not there to wipe away the tears. i dont wanna see tommorow if your not right there with me. i dont wanna be with anyone else if its not gonna be you. Only you b.

Hope you will happy without me and more happy with her..
Thanks for everythings